Losing to win?

It wasn't long ago that Charlie Sheen was being blitzed by the media for his latest fall from grace. Images of a seemingly "scrambled" Sheen flooded our televisions and computer screens, all media outlets capitalizing on this crumbling man. His "Winning" charade slowly fizzled out. 

My life is nothing like The Wild Thing's, and I even hate to admit I'm using him for the basis of my next thought: Is winning really winning, or is it open to interpretation? If one as obviously screwed up as Charlie Sheen can go on national television and sound so convinced that he's winning, surely I'm winning too.

Obviously winning

Let's put this in perspective. I'm 27 years old. Married twice - once at 18 and of course it didn't last so it doesn't count. My current marriage produced a child of whom I raise full time. College degree? No. Tons of job experience? No. Being a housewife leaves me lots of time to think about this. How did I end up here? Wasn't I a straight-A student in honors classes? I went to college. Have 60+ college hours under my belt but no degree. Hey, ain't I almost 28? Damn, that's almost 30! It's too late for me! How did I let this happen?

Okay. Time to snap out of that train of thought. Let's look at the positive things, shall we? My daughter is beautiful and smart and funny and never ceases to take my breath away. She brings me the most joy in life and watching her learn new things and develop is better than any corporate job or fancy office.  I get to sleep as late as I want - usually. I get to pick what we eat. I can take my daughter to the park on a beautiful day and watch her smile and laugh. Yeah. I'm pretty lucky. If only it paid the bills. 

All the time you hear or about someone who was down and out on his luck, hit rock bottom, and barely making it day to day. All of a sudden, a miracle happens - he lands a big job, he hits the lottery, or a complete stranger lends a hand. Don't get me wrong, a lot of great people have lent helping hands to my family and me, but I can't help but wish something would happen. Something to lift my family up, to ease our worries, and to cushion our bottoms from these flat wallets in our back pockets. Until then, I have to stay positive and keep the faith that my time is coming. Hopefully.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=pipTwjwrQYQ